Maybe it was time I spent working out of town a couple months ago, staying at a hotel chain that specialized in business travelers. I got a good, free continental breakfast each morning and was able to snag an apple, banana and peanut butter sandwich to take with me for lunch.

Maybe my brain wasn’t firing on all cylinders after a night of kid horseplay and wiggling (and not sleep), with Agalia and DJ excited about how we were going to spend the next day.

Whatever the reason, when I saw that big 1 liter bottle of water sitting next to two glasses in our room at the Hilton, it said to me “You look thirsty, Jack. Have a nice glass of water. On us.” Before I could question the bottle’s candor, I’d twisted the top and broken the seal. That’s when I noticed the tag attached to the neck of the bottle THAT WAS ALMOST AS BIG AS THE BOTTLE. That tag didn’t say anything like “Complimentary” or “This water is Hilton’s way of saying thanks for your patronage.” It’s message was much more succinct: $6.

I spent the next three minutes trying to carefully replace the cap and align the little broken tabs on the bottom plastic ring with the little broken tabs on the cap, then positioning the bottle on the table at just the right angle, so when the cleaning staff entered to room, it appeared unopened.