I’m going to keep my review of the Vice Presidential debate short and superficial.

Sarah Palin does not want Iran to have Nookyuler weapons. I guess I wouldn’t mind. I mean, a “Nookyuler Weapon” is just a supersized pacifier you bonk someone over the head with, right?

Joe Biden has had hair implants, and it appears that he also wanted to make himself look like Burt Reynolds by having his eyelids taped to his ears. I don’t think that means anything regarding a vice presidency, just thought it was vain. And Joe probly thinks this post is about him.

I didn’t like Gwen Ifill as moderator. Despite a right leaner’s predisposition for not liking people working for left leaning organizations, I thought she was even-handed enough in her questions and division of time. It just seemed like she was irritated by both Biden and Palin. I thought Lehrer did a much nicer job of speaking to each and bringing them out in the first debate.

That being said, I think we need someone like Chris Matthews moderating the debates. I can’t stand the guy, but he’d get some effing answers to the questions.

I thought Palin showed herself to be a quick study. I’m not sure I want someone who’s been cramming to live in The Admiral’s House. I want someone who’s been actually studying for awhile.

Whatever station I was watching was comparing Palin’s performance in the debate to previous debates that included Harry Truman and Andrew Jackson. ANDREW JACKSON. You might recognize Mr. Jackson by the famous portrait of him to the right. The woman making that comparison looked fantastic for being over 180 years old. That she could remember a debate from the 1830’s is spectacular. Maybe she was a vampire.

I was torn a bit by Biden’s performance - he threw so many bits of information out without enough intro to those bits that I was all huh? Couple that with a few “Obama - I mean McCain” and sprinkle in some double negatives and I was lost. I didn’t know if he just had sooo many tidbits of information up there in his aesthetically modified head and so little time to get them out that it necessitated the hurried delivery, or if he was making shit up as he went along. Probably not, but I though Biden could have done better.

I thought Biden was a perfect gentleman during the debate. Maybe a bit toothy when Palin was popping him in the nose, but overall very nice.

Palin took the first swing (of negativity). Biden seemed to be able to handle the blow and return it pretty easily.

I’m tired of Palin (or anyone, for that matter) talking about “winning” in Iraq. There isn’t a scoreboard, there’s no game clock. We just need to rebuild that country as best we can while getting hammered by religious freaks.

The Fargo accent is starting to drive me crazy. If it were coming from Biden’s mouth I’d expect him to be wearing overalls. That it’s coming from Palin’s makes it a bit more palatable. But not much.

Because Palin had to spin off a few questions to get to territory within her wheelhouse, and because Biden was able to handle every question sent his way (though neither answered them all, something I’m coming to expect), I’d have to give this debate to Biden.

Damn! I thought this was going to be short. Oh well. Sucks to be you, I suppose.